


Harry's Secret

by Tilosaur (Spaceytrash)



Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Alcohol, Gay Character, Gen, One-Sided Attraction, Panic Attacks, Unrequited Love, kind of, mention of violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-01
Updated: 2019-05-01
Packaged: 2020-02-15 18:22:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18675016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spaceytrash/pseuds/Tilosaur
Summary: Harry harbours a secret and after a not so fantastic night Eggsy finds out what exactly his friend was hiding from him.





	Harry's Secret

It was not like he was ashamed; in fact, he wasn't. He was proud of who he was.

A Kingsman Agent, who could say that about himself after all? Exactly, not that many.

And just because he was gay, he should feel ashamed of himself, even though he saves thousands of people on a daily basis? No, not Harry. He was proud of who he was even if the rest of the world seemed not to agree with his worldview but then again since when did he care about what other people thought about him? Like he said to Eggsy, a Gentleman isn't simply one because of how he speaks, what accent he has or has not but about how comfortable one feels in their own skin and Harry felt very comfortable in his own skin.

 

 

Which raises the question why he didn't tell Eggsy that he actually was not straight, that he really had no interest in a wife, and that he certainly didn't want to participate in speed-dating or whatever they call it nowadays.

But alas, he didn't and that is why he is now sitting in this bleak restaurant with a middle-aged woman in front of him who was telling him her whole life story, in which he frankly had no interest at all.

This was the fifth women already and the others had been basically the same. Gradually he started to lose his patience, but he was too much of a gentleman to interrupt her or break this whole thing off. Just as she was about to start another long string of conversation the bell, that signified the end of the round, rang and Harry let out a sigh.

 

 

He looked over to Eggsy who hold two thumbs up and had a big grin on his face, signalling that Harry was doing well. The aforementioned Kingsman braced himself and waited for the next babbling woman to come, which she promptly did. She was around 45-50 years old and looked like she belonged to the middle class, like most of the women in this restaurant. Harry ushered a greeting to her as she said down. With a smile she started to talk about her life just like the others had.

Just before Harry completely drifted off into his own thoughts, he heard her say:

 

“And you know these gays these days they try to ruin our kids. Infecting them with their sinful ways. It's a shame really, that they're allowed to walk around freely now. It was better in the past when these disgusting people were still prosecuted. Don’t you agree?”

 

At first, he was shocked, not many people expressed their opinion that openly and especially not to a complete stranger, but then he felt the anger inside him rise.

It reminded him of the church in Kentucky. Of the shit they preached there, of the anger he felt and couldn't control back then. It reminded him of his death.

 

With a haggard motion, almost stumbling over his chair he stood up, said: “You have no idea who you are talking to and be glad of that, have a good day madame” and went outside in a rush.

 

He needed air before he lost his control completely.

He could see the blonde head of another woman who had spit out the same hateful messages. He could see her head explode. He could feel the blood on his skin again. Touching his face to make sure there was no new or old blood on it. He felt the anger boiling in him and his control lessen. This couldn't happen, not again, not now. Outside Harry tried to control his breathing and with that control the anger he felt inside with only a moderate success.

 

 

Suddenly he felt a hand on his shoulder. Automatically he grabbed it and pulled the person belonging to the hand, in front of him to hold him in a strong and secure grip.

 

“Oi Harry relax it's just me!”

 

Slowly Harry released Eggsy and with an embarrassed face apologized softly.

 

“You okay, man? You just ran out of there all of sudden. Did she say something to you?”

 

“That she did indeed, but nothing important and nothing for you to worry about.”

 

Eggsy scoffed: “Let me decide for myself if I worry about it or not, will ya? C'mon what did she say to you?”

 

Harry just grunted and looked away, not saying a word.

 

 “C'mon it was not nothing or else you wouldn't have left the room so abruptly.”

 

They stood like this for a minute, neither of them saying another word until Harry murmured: “She said some derogatory thing about certain minorities just like...back in Kentucky”

 

Harry didn't need to say more he could clearly see, thanks to Eggsy's expressive face that the other understood what had happened.

 

“Harry... I'm sorry-”

 

“Don't be. It happens. There is nothing you can do to change it and it isn't your fault.”

 

Eggsy looked to the ground for a minute and then softly smiled at Harry

 

“I think this calls for a Martini just like before all this shit.”

 

At that Harry had to smile Eggsy just knew how to calm him down and make things a bit better. “I whole heartily agree.” with that the two Kingsmen Agents left the dark street of the restaurant and made their way to Harry’s new house.

 

 

After opening the front door both were happily welcomed by Mr. Pickle II.

 

“Down boy, that's enough.” the dog let off of both of them and went to his cushion in the living room.

 

The Agents swiftly following him. While Harry went to his bar and started to prepare a Martini for both of them, Eggsy sat on the couch.

 

“You didn't really enjoy yourself tonight, did you Harry? You didn't enjoy one of the dates I set up for you, be honest.”

 

“To be frank I really did not”, with that he poured both of them a glass and walked over to the younger man, sat down and gave away the second glass.

 

“Ta. Then why didn't you say so? Why did you even agree to this? Especially tonight. I know speed-dating isn't really your kind of thing. Yet you agreed to do it. Why?”

 

Harry looked down on his glass. He couldn't really tell Eggsy the real reason why he participated even though these things just weren't for him. He hardly could just blurt out 'Well I went along with it because you asked and had that certain sad but cute look in your eyes to which I never can say no and oh by the way I'm gay and in love with you, that's why I didn't enjoy your set ups and why I'm secretly very jealous of Tilde' Instead of saying all this he just shrugged and said he didn't know. Both took a sip of their drink during a pregnant pause.

 

“I'm very glad you didn't stay dead Harry.”

 

That brought a small smile unto the older Agent's lips: “Yeah, I'm glad too”

 

With that Eggsy let out a soft laugh and murmured softly: “You know I really missed you”

 

Harry looked at Eggsy with a soft expression and put his hand on the younger man's leg. If Eggsy would have looked closely at Harry, he would have seen the other's expression of sadness and also of love, but he didn't. They both stayed silent for a while, caught in their own thoughts and then the older got up and fetched a bottle of scotch. They drank for a bit trying to forget their respective sorrows.

 

“Harry can I ask you something? You don't really have to answer if you don't want to.” Eggsy asked softly with slight uncertain tone.

 

The aforementioned just nodded. “Do you even wanted to find a girlfriend?”

 

This made the older man flinch.

 

“You don’t, do ya? You're not even interested in girls, right? Not that there's anything wrong with that but you know...”

 

 

Apparently now is the time Harry had waited and feared for. The time to come clean about his sexual orientation (not that he would tell Eggsy how he really felt about him as that was a completely different matter altogether). He really wasn't ashamed of himself, but he was worried that maybe Eggsy would think less of him even though he just said that he wouldn't.

But then again saying is one thing, actually meaning it is another.

 

After taking another sip of his drink he looked down on his glass and nodded a bit: “Yes, I am not sexually interested in women, in fact I'm am actually gay. I hope this won't come between us, that would be a real shame.”

 

Harry didn't dare look up from his glass in fear of seeing disgust or something similar in Eggsy's eyes.

 

He suddenly felt a clap on his shoulder: “Nah, I don't care that you're gay and it would be very ungentlemanly of me to judge you just cause you prefer men over women. I just didn't suspect that you might be gay. Actually, I always had you down as a typical British man. Upper-class, polite and heterosexual”

 

After Eggsy's reassuring words Harry felt a weight lift of his shoulders and let out a breath he didn't knew he had been holding.

 

“You would be surprised of how many upper-class people are actually homosexual.” Harry chuckled.

 

Eggsy joined in on the laugh. Feeling lighter than he did for months he poured them both another glass.

 

“But you know what I don't get? Why you didn't just tell me. Did you really peg me down as some homophobic asshole? Did you really think that my standards were that low? I get that you wouldn't want to flaunt it out and about as I know that not everyone's comfortably with it for whatever reason, but did you really think I would just suddenly hate you because you liked men?”

 

“Don't ridicule yourself, you know that I don't think that your standards are that low. I just didn't know how to tell you and even though I knew you probably wouldn't think less of me I still had an ounce of fear that you would. With your upbringing in the estates I wasn't a 100 percent sure that you wouldn't have accumulated a little repulsion against homosexuals. And I am truly sorry for having that doubt.”

 

Harry said calmly but thought: “but if you would know that I have fallen in love with you, you probably would be disgusted by me...”

 

Eggsy looked at Harry with a certain glint in his eyes and a pie-eating grin: “Can I tell you a secret? I'm actually bisexual”

 

Harry felt his eyebrows rise. “Really? Don't take this the wrong way but I hadn't had you begged for a bisexual”

 

“There's a lot that you don't know about me”; the younger man's smile grew tenfold and he let the tip of his tongue show.

 

Harry smiled back: “That I'm sure of. I think this calls for a celebrational drink.”

 

With that he stood up and went to his bar, starting to mix a very pink drink. “If we both came out, we have to celebrate in in style”

 

He laughed, Eggsy started to join in and went over to the bar: “To us”

 

 

Both took their respective glasses, toasted to each other and took a drink. The moment Eggsy tasted it his eyebrows rose up: “Wow that actually isn't half bad” And with that both Kingsman agents chuckled.

**Author's Note:**

> So I found this on my laptop and apparently I wrote this during a lecture at uni last year and forgot about it.


End file.
